one day nothing changes. that's all that happens and it changes you because you see for the first time how extraordinary your life is, how every breath in and exhalation should be nothing but praise for the wind and the rain that falls evenly on us all, soaking us eventually through thick wool sweaters that generate heat the longer they're worn, and the pillow in our bed carries still your smell and a few long hairs curl right next to the indentation that marks how perfectly your head rested here, where I now stand almost numb, frozen almost with grief, wondering if standing here will dissolve the time we spent doing nothing.